When I was in grade school, we used to have earthquake drills. The office would sound an alarm, and our teacher would tell us to crawl under our desks so we could practice in case there was an actual earthquake. I remember sitting under my desk, wondering how my simple wooden desk, filled with pencils and notebooks, would protect me if a big ceiling piece fell on top of it. 

Now I am a teacher and have my own classroom, and we still have drills with students. But we don’t practice for earthquakes; we practice for active shooter events. When the office alerts us to this drill, I lock the classroom door and then gather on the floor with my students in the corner. We sit as quietly as possible, and I usually have to remind students not to bump into the closet doors or whisper to each other. We wait for the sound of someone testing the door to be sure it is locked, and we stay on the floor until the intercom announces that the drill is over.

After these drills, my mind is on high alert for several days. So, as I walk around my classroom, leading discussions and assisting students, I realize there is no place to hide in the classroom if a shooter comes in. My mind also tries to solve what I would use to break the windows to help students escape. These queries follow me home, and as I do the dishes, I think about what I have in my classroom that my students and I could throw at a shooter if they were to enter the room; there aren’t many choices. 

This has been a catastrophic week with the recent school shooting in Uvalde, Texas. As my husband and I drove into the school’s parking lot each day, the flag was half-mast. Not to mourn the loss of a dignitary or world leader but to mourn the loss of little fourth-grade students and their heroic teachers who died, filled with fear, at the hands of a gunman. I watched a Tik Tok showing photos of the victims, and I wept. I recognized the look on the young faces in those pictures; it was a look of joy, hope, and a love of life. That is now gone and replaced with a cavity of grief that sears the hearts of their families and the entire world.

Teachers know how to deal with problems in the classroom. For example, if a student is not using their Chromebook appropriately, we take it away so they will pay attention. If a student is throwing paper airplanes, we take the paper away so they will pay attention. If people are shooting students in United States classrooms, maybe we should take guns away so they will pay attention.